When life drones on like a drunken relative, leaving too much time for stinking thinking, and old worries dig their way out from their graves with zombie like skill, then it’s time to gather things up and set them in order.
If you don’t know what to do with a problem the best thing to do is to leave it alone. I mean really, look at it with its lunatic stare and inflamed gums, curled into the corner like Lizzie Borden ready to strike. Do you really feel capable of dealing with that thing, or would you rather take a dip in the pool? No brainer—right?
If you haven’t been able to fix the situation then chances are it’s not time to fix it. After all, it’s really not bothering anyone as long as you leave it alone. It’s only when you poke and prod it with your yardstick that it gets testy.
What? You say it’s a big problem? Well then this calls for big distractions, unless of course you have a solution, in which case go at it. Otherwise, step away from the joy killer and get a life.
Go do something else. Anything else! Hide a walky-talky in the bushes and then sit inside with the other walky-talky and say things to people when they walk by, like: “I saw what you did!” Or go to a crowded beach with a box of cheerios and feed the hungry seagulls, then act innocent when the sunbathers get dive-bombed and shat upon.
There are about a zillion other things you could be doing besides harassing your fears. So what that these pranks are a tad aggressive; it’s fun to kick back once in awhile, surely whatever karma these deeds trigger will be minor. Certainly nothing more than a flopped soufflé or a stubbed toe—it will be well worth it.
* Mrs. Cronin is a genius.
I find when I get busy living life, my problems fade, and my creativity rises. I also notice that I’m much more likely to discover solutions with my mind pacified. It gives the magic a chance to happen, allowing life to direct me with serendipitous events—events that I would never be clever enough to orchestrate on my own, and then abracadabra! the solution finds me.
This weekend a friend visited for an overnighter. She came with her jammies packed, along with some other useless bullshit that she wasn’t sure what to do with. You know… her collection of dilemmas that believe just because they belong to her that they are invited to go everywhere she goes.
I was well prepared for her visit, having spent many musical hours mixing sangria, and preparing a kick-ass meal. But, just one day prior to this I was obsessing over a situation of my own. One I’d been knocking around for years without any real solutions. Preparing for my friend’s visit distracted me from my neurosis, clearing the stage for some fun, while also equipping me with the strength to chase off some of her blues before they had a chance to spoil the party.
Some struggles have incredible longevity, hanging around for years, and like back-seat-drivers they nag and bully us—if we let them. We do have a choice. I believe that our trials are tailor-made, sent to teach us valuable lessons. In a way we must make room for them in our lives, while at the same time we must contain them by keeping them in their rightful places—until the solution comes along to claim them.
Fretting and obsessing over difficulties is busy-work for scaredy cats. Take your power back by doing something different, and then forgetaboutit!
34 comments:
How did you know just what I needed today? And I'm pretty sure I needed those awesome pics of you as well as your words of encouragement! I freakin' love you.
LOL! Marie, I always teach what I need. Mrs. Cronin may be a bit crusty but she's right on! I freakin' love you too!
There's never a dull moment reading your post. You make everything charming....even the fears we face. Loved it.
Thanks Janu! Mrs. Cronin needs to visit more often;)
When my wife tells me about a problem she's having I always try and fix whatever is wrong. She usually scolds me and says that she doesn't want me to fix her problem, she just wants me to listen. I find this frustrating. But I think men are more inclined to want to fix things than women. Sexist I know, but this has been my experience.
Stephen, when your wife is telling you about her problems she probably has all intentions of fixing them but simply wants a listening ear. Perhaps she wants to fix it herself, or let things work out. Either way I don't believe you're a sexist, just a very sweet husband.
My dear Leah,
Point taken my friend (smile). All of us have days like this and yes, we must cope with them. Personally, I accept reality quickly and do by best to FIX the problem. When it comes to my beautiful wife...her problems are also mine. Together we fix them as a team. Thanks for sharing.
Dear Leah,
Guess what? You've been featured this week over at my blog. I have a little something for you. Come see here...
Love the photo impersonation of Mrs. Cronin;-) Though she doesn’t bear much physical resemblance, she reminds me of a teacher I had, a stout woman with a bosom large as two globes put together, silver cat-eye glasses. A matronly woman you’d better not mess with. Think I’ll write about her in a future post.
Forgetaboutit! Get busy living or get busy dying. Some problems you can never resolve. Like how other people in your life act.
You are a genius, Leah, to have handled your overnight guest so well ;-)
My friend Becky is returning Cosette’s Tribe to me tomorrow night – yah! Check you later.
Always a pleasure reading your posts Leah.
http://rimlybezbaruah.blogspot.in/2012/08/call-of-night.html
Leah, this was great. I love the message, and especially the pics!
Love it!
Thank you Andy, as you can see I've proudly hung it on my wall here at ELR. That was so totally sweet of you, but hey...you're a sweet guy;)
XOXO
Debra, my friend handled me well too. We do that for each other;) I can't wait to read about your teacher. There's something tender about those crusty old birds.
I'm excited that you'll be getting Cosette back from your friend. I hope she enjoyed it.
Always a pleasure to see you here Rimly!
Hugs!
Lynn, thank you for the visit. I hope your trip to Europe is amazing. I'm sure you will come back with lots of tales to tell...hopefully none with squirrels in them. Better check your luggage before you leave;)
Thanks Karen;)
First of all, I absolutely love the pictures of you, Leah. And Mrs Cronin sure is a wise lady - she sounds a lot like you ;)
Your photo impressions of Mrs. Cronin is a hoot, Leah! When I read your post, this old, old song came to mind - "Pack up your troubles in your old kit bag, and smile, smile, smile". Life is too short to have problems keep us down. Sure, we may have to stop and fix things, but, I'm with you - if the solution doesn't come quickly to mind, the answer isn't there yet. We can choose to fret or choose to rejoice in the day.
Fantastic inspiration and, always, lively descriptions!
Blessings!
Well, my darling girl, as always, it is a delight to visit your world! "It gives the magic a chance to happen..." was a polarizing comment. You know I'm a proponent of embracing and recognizing magic and the truth is, we need to open up space in our lives for the magic to enter.
Too much time on our hands...the Devil's workshop and all that...it's true! I'd much rather be active & stretching my brain and heart than sitting inactive, with nothing else to focus on but my woes. There lies madness of a strong sort, after all, and I want no part of it! At times, spiritual insanity does hit, and we weather it out of necessity, but I am certainly not going to welcome it in to set up permanent housekeeping. I prefer for Magic to be my regular house guest.
Much love, chickadee! <3
- Dawnie
Quite a coincidence that I have been reading a book on letting go of fears. I agree sometimes it is best to leave the problem alone. We should be like a chilled mountain where the desert winds do not reach. nothing has the power to bother us, except the power we give it by attention
Jerly, I'm learning the same thing. We give our power away all the time to the things that we fear. I'm learning to get my power back one lesson at a time. I like the chilled mountain analogy. Very nice!
Ooo, our country is all flood and zero in the Olympics and here goes my little child 'Melissa' with her 'loneliness'...LOL!
But you're absolutely right about many things and I channeled my energies to more useful~ purposeful things.
I do not know who Mrs. Cronin is but you both inspired me and hit the point ;)
Lots of love to you Leah :*
Thank you Corinne! It was fun stepping into Mrs. Cronin's skirt;)
Martha, I remember that song!
Sometimes we get too complicated with problems. It's like when a person picks at a scab and then announces to the world that they're bleeding. Leave the scab alone and let the wound heal! LOL!! Thanks for your visit Martha. It's always a treat to see you.
OXOXO
Exactly Dawn. My you have a way of snipping things down into bite-sized treats!
I'm keeping my mind in a positive place and my hands busy. Or was it the other way around? Shit!
Holy Smokes! This was such an amazing post! I am bookmarking this one. This is just the voice I need to wake up and get over it already! I love how you actually put your money where your mouth is, and had a musical time preparing for your friend. I so wish you lived next door!
You know what is great too, is there is love pouring through your post.
So relevant to a relationship issue I was facing, but had no idea how to respond. I, too, just put it in the back seat, and let go over and over--and what do you know, it no longer exists (today)! This was so awesome. I LOVE YOU, LEAH!!!
Brooke! You're enthusiasm is contagious! I love this fricken post too because it kicks my arse into gear. Sometimes we need to keep moving and not stop to diagnose and therapize every little thing. Geesh!
I love you too Brooke and I'm glad that you were able to receive the love that was sandwiched between my sarcasm. Onward and upward girl!
I'm so glad you're here with me!!!!
Oh! I love this! I love you, Leah Griffith!
I'm always amazed by how we keep getting the same message over and over. Just this morning I received a message in my inbox, my favorite part of the message said: "The world will perform its magic when you step into yours. That is the promise of God, and it will be kept."
It is getting clearer & clearer to me that when I just LIVE and breathe and go to the ocean for the day with my dear friend and kiddos, all the heaviness seems to fade and things become so much clearer. We can just step into our magic and all else will take care of itself--how beautiful is that?
I'm so glad I came here today.
I feel so much love for you, my friend. You are a beauty.
I'm back to visit! And I am mind boggled that I read your post the first time and missed the suggestion of taking a box of Cheerios to the beach and feeding them to the critters. How did I miss that the first time?! Well, I saw it this time, and I readily admit that I would be all kinds of greedy and selfish when it comes to anything getting between me and my Cheerios! LOL...I can nibble my way through a box of those over the course of a day. Ahh...the simple joys! And I do believe that that makes Cheerios qualify as a Magical Moment. Yes. :)
Loving you, honey.
- Dawn
"Some struggles have incredible longevity, hanging around for years, and like back-seat-drivers they nag and bully us—if we let them. We do have a choice. I believe that our trials are tailor-made, sent to teach us valuable lessons." Leah, you have a marvelous way with words. Humor and satire and truth... and always, always, wisdom.
With those glasses on, I can picture you penning an "Ask Leah" column. Syndicated, no doubt. (And lots and lots of mail!) ;)
Julie, you are exactly right. Today, over a week later, I learned this same lesson again. For such good news you'd think we would hold onto it longer. Anyway, I'm taking my own advice and enjoying life while letting the magic happen on its own.
I love you girl!!
Dawnie, me too. Cheerios are a great snack or can be served for breakfast lunch or dinner. I'm an easy soul when it comes to food. Just feed me:)
Big Hugs!
Jayne, I love the glasses and felt quite at home channeling for Mrs. Cronin. I get the feeling that nothing frightens her;)
Thanks for the sweet comment Jayne.
Hugs aways.
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